I have told a number of people over time that I am a true child of media. The MTV generation for sure. I have this weird collection of film clips and quotes stuck in my head that pop up all the time in reference to other things.
An example is from Conan The Barbarian, the 1982 film with Arnold and James Earl Jones. The ‘riddle of steel’ scene always stuck with me. “What is steel compared to the hand that wields it?” They call it the power of flesh, but it is about the people and how they’re connected.
Rebecca, in her life, wielded great power. She wasn’t interested in being some kind of cult leader, she just knew that people needed to be together. She connected with people, sometimes even when they didn’t particularly feel like they wanted it. Sometimes when they didn’t feel they deserved it. She was direct and clear about who she was, and brought that to her relationships as well. People were drawn to her.
On the day of Rebecca’s celebration of rememberance a stranger to all of us walked in. He introduced himself and gave me a card with a letter inside. I was stunned. Here was a man who had been walking past the funeral home and saw the announcement of the celebration by chance. As it turned out, he did know Rebecca. 36 years ago Rebecca saw somebody who needed a friend and extended her power. She reached out to a ‘loner’ and made such an impression that decades later she was important to him.
I’m sharing the (slightly redacted) letter here because I think it’s important to speak to the power of connecting with people. Rebecca was special in that way, and we need her kind of power more than ever now. Reach out to people. Connect. Show your love. Take those chances. It might matter more than you will ever know.
There are still other people in the
world. I know that sounds silly, but I also know that if you’ve been
quarantined at home for a couple of weeks you might lose track of
that simple fact.
It’s easy to consider others when
you’re reaching out across a computer connection. People still exist
in the real world too. This is not some bizarre Martrix variation. I
am putting this out there because of a small incident from early this
morning.
I am fortunate to be among those who
are still working. There are a lot of folks out there that aren’t and
that’s causing people to make some difficult choices. Because I am
still working, I am still on my regular old schedule. On that
schedule I am up relatively early ~ and generally out the door for a
brisk walk of a mile or more every morning around 5:30 am.
For a community on “lock-down” and
under a government mandated stay at home order there were a LOT of
people out there, including the local share-a-ride bus. Again, at the
risk of sounding silly a couple of dozen cars out and moving that
early is a lot. I am very aware of my surroundings while I’m out like
that. It’s early, it’s dark most days and I have no desire to be
accidentally run over by somebody that hasn’t made it to the local
coffee shop to “wake up” yet (that’s an entirely different
discussion for a later date).
When I was walking up to one of the
intersections a car from the neighborhood down that street rolled up
almost to the corner and stopped abruptly. I normally take the
crosswalk and keep chugging along, but I hesitated and slowed down.
The driver of this car – a young lady that I’m certain was on the
way to some kind of work deemed life sustaining – while still in
gear, opened the driver side door. I thought perhaps she was going to
ask something or was in need of assistance. I stopped and waited.
While I was watching from the sidewalk on the passenger side of her
car she proceeded to search around insider her car as if she’d lost
something. Ducking down below window level, craning back over toward
the back seat… generally looking scattered.
Here was my thought process: IF you’re
looking for something, take your car out of gear and put it into
park. IF you can’t figure out how to turn the dome light on in your
car without opening the door, perhaps you should pay more attention
to how to operate this machine you’re in charge of… IF this young
lady couldn’t manage to handle those two basic things there was NO
WAY I was going to walk in front of her car to cross the street. Not
happening, no matter how much reflective stuff I have on.
Here’s the part that prompted this
post. As I went around the back of her car to continue my walk
something reflective must have caught her eye since I was walking
through the light of her brake lights. She looked shocked and shaken
that somebody else existed in the world. I had my headphones in, but
I think there might have been a squeak that came out of her car that
had nothing to do with car parts needing oil. She proceeded to stare
at me as I walked away for a really long time. I almost wanted to go
back and ask her if she was OK – but when I was probably 20 or 30
yards away and looked back I heard the car door slam shut and she
pulled around the corner.
I know that stay at home orders are challenging. Please don’t forget that eventually you will need to go out and deal with real people in the actual, physical world again. You’re going to need to be extra vigilant to avoid people that forget there are other people in the world…
